I want to cover the topic of burn out because it affects everyone at some point in their lives.
Since we live in a social media world we have probably heard about this topic a lot from content creators be it from Youtube, TikTok, Twitch, or elsewhere. We often feel it but we don't ever talk about it from your every day person and that's why I'm bringing this blog post to you today.
Currently I am experiencing burn out. One could ask "How are you experiencing burn out because you aren't producing any real work right now?" Burn out comes in many forms and isn't necessarily tied down to just one job, a craft, or a hobby. Sometimes we just get burnt out from every day life.
There is a mundaneness that we get from going day by day and doing the same thing every day. While the routine may not always be the same we see ourselves falling into habits that wear on us.
In my own current experience I wondered if I was really hitting burn out of if I was just falling in to a mild depression. I find myself pulling away or not as responsive to my friends and family as I used to be, I'm always exhausted, and I can't ever seem to find the time for things when in reality I have plenty of time. Case and point, here I am writing this at 1:00 am when I could be working on artwork. There's a shift in priorities. Sometimes a 4 hour block of time isn't enough for me to sit down and work and then I make excuses and that right there is how I know I've hit burn out. It's not that I'm too lazy, have other things to do, other priorities at the time, but I'm making excuses. Excuses like "That's not enough time" and "I won't be able to get into a zone."
The truth of the matter is that I have a lot of things on my plate. I have a lot of "I want to do and I need to dos" and then there is the "This is what you should be doing." There is the need to put forth some effort on my own creations especially since I've made some breakthroughs with them and then there is the con crunch. I'm planning Power-Con 2022 but I just got an email about it 4 months out and feel I am no where ready. I know I need to diversify my artwork a little bit for a larger audience and I'm just not sure where or how to go about it. I'm overwhelmed. I'm burnt out not because I'm exhausted or tired of doing a certain task but I'm burnt out because I've got so much pressure on me for what I SHOULD be doing. Did I mention that I'm not a full time artist and that I have a full time job as an industrial mechanic?
For transparency what I've been doing is "decompressing" by playing x-box, watching news, and working on an art piece that should have been done long ago. None of that seems to be helping because playing games when it comes to an online competitive game just causes more stress, I don't think I even need to tell you how current news isn't relaxing, and then an overdue piece simply because I can't get the anatomy correct so I'm fighting it.
So that's where I'm at, burnt out. That's not to say that I can't and that I won't push through. I just wanted to take a moment to discuss where I'm at. I've fallen out of a few habits that have always been helpful to me, my soul, and my mental health.
I'm glad I could discuss burn out, especially mine with you guys. Next time, we will talk some more bread and butter, Power-Con 2022, things I've done behind the scenes, and my own personal projects.
-Pat!